Saturday, August 7, 2010

Saturday Centus #14 New Mexico Mountain Travel

This is Saturday Centus # 14 The prompt must be used word for word somewhere in the story on not more than 100 words.The prompt is highlighted. For complete rules see:http://jennymatlock.blogspot.com.
Even the calming cobalt of a cloudless sky couldn’t keep Sam’s heart from pounding like a heavy hammer on an anvil. He knew the black SUV was following him on he narrow road, and he had to reach Santa Fe fast. He was sure anxiety had caused him to make a wrong turn, putting him on the tortuous mountain back road. He was glancing at the small gray letters of “Objects in rear view mirror are closer than they appear"when the cattle guard of the sinister vehicle rammed his bumper pushing his van over the road’s rocky edge and tumbling him into a deep and jagged ravine.

20 comments:

RockiBottom said...

Ooooh... I want more!

Unknown said...

Wow! That's a whole lot of story in just a few words. Nice! And I agree with Rocki...I want more, too!

Viki said...

OH NO!!! lol I wonder why he got pushed over the edge. Great descriptive language. Good job.

lissa said...

what a sad ending, though it does makes me wonder who this Sam is and perhaps the other vehicle's driver is one of his enemy

Kim Lehnhoff said...

It made me think of the TV movie 'Truck', where this sinister semi tracks and tortures some poor driver in a manner similar to your story.

I hate tailgaters!

Koby said...

I have to tell you that I don't normally watch (or read) suspenseful things..don't like my heart to pound hard...that said, I loved your use of the prompt.

Susan Anderson said...

Yikes. And you left us in suspense, too...

Well done!

=)

Malisa said...

Well, I don't want to be in a ravine, but I would love to be in Santa Fe! :) I've been down some of those deserted roads. Very nice description!

Malisa

Jenners said...

Oh man ... what a cliffhanger (literally!!!). I feel like I walked into the middle of a thriller and then right back out again! Good job!

Unknown said...

Oh, no!!!
So tragic.
But well-written!
Best wishes,
Anna

Vicki/Jake said...

Never to be found.....

Great suspense this week!

jfb57 said...

Oooo! Crumbs that was a bit of a twist at the end! Great post!

Kat said...

Wow! I'd love to read more of this. Great use of the prompt. Nice and suspenseful, with a great twist. Kat

easternsparkle said...

Oh heck - good take on the prompt!!

cj Schlottman said...

Claudia. I like to write that name because we share it. That said, this is a perfect example of what a Saturday Centus should be - cramming the most into the smallest space, having it make sense and leaving the reader wanting more.

Thanks for a great post..........cj

~Lissa said...

I was so quickly pulled right into the story and then the 100 words are up...Like everyone else, what happens next!? Good job!

jeff campbell said...

CJ, I agree...a lot of bang for your buck. I would like to know the set up to this scene...Peace and blessings

Cheryl said...

CJ, you are a mysterious force.

Terra said...

Oh I was waiting for one of these! I couldn't pull it off - you did great! Love the suspense.

Jenny said...

WHAT??????!!!!!

No. Come back here right this minute.

You can't possibly leave this story unsaid.

Seriously, Missy.

Get back here and finish this story. You can have all the words you need!

Great, great use of the prompt!